Being Played

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You know the old expression, "Fool me once, shame on you; fool me twice, shame on me."

How does that work when someone hurts you and seeks your forgiveness?  Do you forgive them a second time?

Then Peter came and said to him, "Lord, if another member of the church sins against me, how often should I forgive? As many as seven times?" Jesus said to him, "Not seven times, but, I tell you, seventy-seven times. - Matthew 18:21-22

This is a truly tall order, don't you think?

If someone hurts me a second time and seeks my forgiveness once again, I might start to think he or she is pulling my leg, taking advantage, or just plain insincere. Doesn't someone need to be sincere in one's repentance?

In general, I believe few of us have the patience or tolerance for repeated attempts to move us to compassion.  We don't even like it when someone asks for help multiple times.

This is one of those teachings we tend to let flow by, hoping to catch onto something more meaty, something we can actually do.  And we find that in the parable that comes next.

Jesus goes on to tell the story of a man whose debts were forgiven, only to have him go out and refuse to forgive the debts of someone who owed him.

That we can do.  That is easy.  Seventy-seven times is another story.

In the story of the ones who owed the money, both asked for the debts to be reduced or forgiven.  They sought forgiveness, but the one who refused to do the same for another showed he was not at all repentant.  He should have felt compassion, having just spared his own life or avoided prison.

So, this is where we get caught up in this.  We look for sincerity and true repentance in others before we decide to forgive.  That is a judgment call, something we are not equipped to do, at least not with any real accuracy or objectivity.

So, unless we forgive, we are doomed to judge, letting our egos take over.  We don't want to be played the fool.

So, is forgiveness on such a grand scale even possible?

Probably not, unfortunately.  If we make it to three we are lucky, and if we go beyond that, we are subject to the judgment of others.  We risk being played.

More to come...