Being There
Matthew 26:36-46
How many times do you ask someone to do something before you give up?
Photo by Stacey Franco on Unsplash
Then Jesus went with them to a place called Gethsemane; and he said to his disciples, “Sit here while I go over there and pray.” He took with him Peter and the two sons of Zebedee, and began to be grieved and agitated. Then he said to them, “I am deeply grieved, even to death; remain here, and stay awake with me.” And going a little farther, he threw himself on the ground and prayed, “My Father, if it is possible, let this cup pass from me; yet not what I want but what you want.” Then he came to the disciples and found them sleeping; and he said to Peter, “So, could you not stay awake with me one hour? Stay awake and pray that you may not come into the time of trial; the spirit indeed is willing, but the flesh is weak.” Again he went away for the second time and prayed, “My Father, if this cannot pass unless I drink it, your will be done.” Again he came and found them sleeping, for their eyes were heavy. So leaving them again, he went away and prayed for the third time, saying the same words. Then he came to the disciples and said to them, “Are you still sleeping and taking your rest? See, the hour is at hand, and the Son of Man is betrayed into the hands of sinners. Get up, let us be going. See, my betrayer is at hand.” - Matthew 26:36-46
For Jesus, the limit was three.
Three is a number we find a lot in stories, and it is used here by Matthew, to emphasize the importance of the request.
Could you not stay awake for one hour?
That was all Jesus asked of them, and they couldn’t do it. We can make excuses for them. They had eaten and had drunk wine. They were confused by what he had told them was going to happen. They had given up hope for the future they had imagined.
But what about Jesus?
He was suffering, and he wanted his friends to stay awake with him while he prayed to the Father for deeper understanding of his fate.
This was the most critical time for Jesus, and he had to face it alone.
What we are called to do for our friends is to be there for them in their hour of need. Can we do that?
Or, put another way, why can’t we do that?
What should they have done?
Sometimes, God asks us to wait, to just be present, and yet, waiting can be hard. Today, we would scroll social media, listen to music, read, anything not to be there while thinking we are there for our friend.
One of the hardest things to do for someone is to stay awake for them while they lie there in the hospital bed, struggling to stay awake for their final hours.
We try, but we tire easily, and we find ourselves sleeping away the moments we have with them.
We can’t go back and do those hours over again. Once we spend the time asleep, it is gone.
What does it mean to be there for someone? Our presence is the only thing we can freely give with love, and sometimes we give in to exhaustion and miss making that time the best it could be for them and for us.
To hold a hand and kiss it, to wipe a brow, to pray silently or aloud, these are all things we can do when we sit there at someone’s bedside in their final hours.
Jesus didn’t ask them to do anything but stay awake, and maybe they should have pushed to do more than that. Maybe they regretted later that night, that they let the hours slip by.
We only have this moment. We may think we have more time, but that isn’t guaranteed. What can we do now to make this hour better for us and someone we love?
The lesson appears to be a simple one. You, my friends, abandoned me in my hour of need.
It is harsh, yes, but isn’t it true?
When we tell someone we will be there for them, we need to be there, fully, alert, awake, present.
They had three chances and they couldn’t do it for him. Still, he loved them.
That is what I take away from this story. He loved them anyway, even though they were too weak to be there for him.
More to come...